As a non-dom Christian surrounded, most times, by Wiccan, Pagans or athiests, I avoid starting conversations on religion, but I will not avoid jumping into one if started. I'm proud of my faith and nothing I've read or anything anyone has said has ever caused me to doubt or waver.
My view is that we have a personal relationship with our creator. That means any problems God has with me, he can (and does) tell me. I don't need someone else telling me what I am, or am not doing right. Because I talk/walk with him, I know he has no problems with most of what I write or read. The same goes with other people. Who am I to tell them how they should be when they are capable of seeking their own answers. I stand accountable for my own actions and beliefs. I'm always willing to share, but never to force on my readers, my friends or total strangers.
I'm a geek, a nerd, a dork! I lust after cat-gurls in animes, fight demons in my dreams! I also believe in science and creationism. I believe God is powerful enough to have made the universe with a big bang, and man through evolution, if that's how he wanted to. Or if he just popped them into existence, then that's fine, too. I believe the bible is living text that means different things to different people depending on their needs. I'm a Christian dweeb who keeps "The Purpose Driven Life" on the same shelf as "Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy." I've slept with vampires and used Monty Python references in church. God is too powerful to be contained.
- Current Mood:blessed
what's even more amazing is that they're rarely the answers to the questions you were asking, but other questions.
If I ask, "Why can't I hear you God?" and get back instead, "Were you ready to listen?"
Of course, you think "no shit! I was asking why I couldn't hear you. That means I was listening and not hearing."
And I get back, "what did you do to hear me?"
"Um, I listened very carefully to hear you? But instead all I got was this other crap. The voices, the ones that tell me everything about my life sucks, and it's either all my fault, or it's all someone else's fault. Oh, then there is the constant voice reminding me how alone I am, that ones the loudest. Over and over again. Settle for less. You're always going to be alone. Why not take what you can before you die? Go fuck that married woman, her husband says it's okay. Oh, why not hit on the beautiful woman with obvious emotional problems? She might be desperate enough to date you? Don't forget me, Fear. You're 40 now. You're days are coming to an end. You're closer to death than birth now. Your body is failing you in ways you've never imagined. The gut isn't going away now. You always believed it would, but it's not. You're fat, old, a fuck up and you're going to die alone in some hospital and no one will even know. And when it's all said and done, you'll leave your son nothing, no legacy, no inheritance, just the truth his father wasn't as good as other fathers.
"That's what I hear."
"Well, how'd you ever expect to hear me with all that racket going on?"
"I don't know. I just figured you were God. You could make it through it all."
"I can't be heard when you're actually hearing all that other stuff. You're choosing to hear that. You don't have to. Now ask the question you really want to know the answer to."
"How do I turn off the voices? The ones that hate. The ones that blame. The ones that want to fuck. The ones that want to kill. The ones that tell me I'll never be good enough. The ones that blame all my troubles on someone else. How do I hear you?"
And the answer I got from church today is to prepare, prepare your heart to hear, and you will hear. It won't be the voice of a man on a pulpit, because it wasn't what the preacher said that ever gets through to me. It's behind that voice. the truth of the words. Man will always let you down, but God never does. Man will always distort the truth, but God never does. You will always try to block the truth by letting the voices fill your head with everything else but the truth, but God is waiting for you to clear your mind; find the still, small silent place and wait. for every step forward you take, he'll take one step forward to meet you.
Next time I can't hear God, I'm going to ask what's keeping me from hearing him, not why isn't he talking to me.
This isn't for you, but maybe it is. This was me getting my thoughts out in some whay I could better understand them, but in the hopes that someone else might be struggling finding God, whatever form he/she believes God takes, I'll leave this public. Nothing has changed about me. I'll still write sci-fi and fantasy, and curse, and have sex, and wish for the loneliness to end, but I fit a piece into the puzzle today. Maybe down the road, I'll start to see the picture.
- Current Mood: relieved
2. Time management
- Current Mood: cynical
"How do I Reach You?"
By David Boop
Out past the sand, the waves.
An image. A vision.
A siren? A mermaid?
Some fragment of a dream?
But find silence returned.
Did I miss the window?
And reach out with my hand,
And my mind, and my heart.
As I find you, searching
For arms that wrap you up
- Current Mood: lonely
When I ran anime clubs, when I gamed, when I went to bars. There was a long list of people I could call on. When I was married, when I was a journalist, when I was young.
I've recently come to the conclusion that I don't have many friends anymore. I don't know how I feel about that. It's not that I don't know people. I know many. Since becoming an author, I've met lots of wonderful people; other authors, fans, convention people. They are friendly, they are supportive, but they're not getting through to that area where true friends exists in our lives.
I count one person in my life that is a true friend, that isn't related to me, nor is an ex (girlfriend or wife.) Problem is, he lives in Seattle and I see him but once a year, if that. I try to make new friends but I'm hampered by my chaotic life. Women friends I make, I end up falling for when they show me kindness because I crave affection so much.
I've lost friends I used to have. Two I lost during my recent move (no, it's not like I don't know which box I put them in. geez.) I had to move, for the most part, by myself, which was a horrible experience. My back is wrecked, I'm behind on everything and I'm broke. I turned to some friends for help, but in both cases, I was denied, and the friendship ended. In both cases, I wasn't even asking for help with the hard stuff. One I asked to help me take over a single load in an evening, the other I asked to help me clean on the final day. They both told me I was asking too much.
I also lost a close friend to death last year. It was sudden and tragic. He was the last friend I had from my anime days and he was gone from my live with a phone call. I lost mentors, relatives and former bosses in 2008. Both my mom and step-dad are in the sunset of their lives.
I have also cut friends from my life; people with negative emotions, users, people of which I have little to nothing in common with. This pruning is necessary, but it adds to the growing feeling of isolation.
My world is getting smaller, yet I don't seem to have what it take anymore to make those deep connections. Maybe I cared less when I was younger, and willing to take on anyone as a friend. Maybe I've grown harder with age, not wanting to risk opening myself for hurt again. Maybe I'm too busy, or my focus is on just that what matters; my son, my family, my craft.
Maybe I'll be the old guy who lives alone, yelling at kids to stay off my lawn.
Maybe, and this is my deepest fear, I'll die in a hospital... alone.
- Current Mood: scared
Many women look at my profile, and a few contact me, mostly in the later column. Over the years, I've developed a list of things I look for and have posted that list on these dating sites. Still, women who don't even qualify for the first few lines contact me, saying how in touch I am with myself and my feelings and to give them a chance. I have, and it always ends in tears.
So, then, when I look at the faces, the countless faces, I have in my mind a woman who I can't see. A woman from my dreams; the few good ones I have. I can never see her face when I wake, even though I try to hold on to it. I wonder if she dreams of me, while looking at countless faces on an online dating site?
I wonder who looks at my picture and says, "that's the face." Lord knows, I ain't getting it right. It's up to her.
- Current Mood: melancholy
It's the the usual hollow. The hollow that comes from being without a SO. I get dates, so eventually one will stay. It's not the hallow that comes from not having faith, because everyday God shows me his love in amazing ways. It's the hollow that comes from not have friends, or family. While they are not in abundance, they are there. It's not the hollow that comes from not having a plan. Since becoming an author, I have a sense of purpose I've never felt before.
It's a hollow that comes from feeling like I'll never be good enough. I'll never be a good enough bf, lover, Christian, friend, son, father, or writer. I could be. I come be the greatest one of those, but not all of them. I want to be the best at them all, and in the attempt, I fail. I'm hollow because I could do better, but I can't. I don't have enough time, nor energy, nor patience, nor intelligence nor compassion to deal with them all. I know this about myself...
and it leaves me hollow.
Space Sirens is the second anthology of the Full-Throttle Space Tales series. Edited by Carol Hightshoe, editor of The Lorelei Signal and Sorcerous Signals, Space Sirens contains 19 seductive tales of women in space, by established and rising-star authors.
The tales woven by our sirens include tales of adventure, intrigue and vengeance:
"Real Hero" by W.A Hoffman: Aphrodite Love is a mega-star who is kidnapped by eco-terrorists and learns what a real hero is.
"Bite the Hand" by Sarah A. Hoyt: Homo Sapiens meet their match in Homo Felis.
"Justice is Not Taken by the Storm" by David Boop: An assassin finds herself switching sides and then being outed by the group she decided to help.
"Just Another Day" by Terri Pray: Gianna hates when people judge her on her looks—now she’s been assigned to guard an actor who is just as stubborn and willful as she is.
"Field Work" by Anna Paradox: A student’s field research takes a dangerous turn when she befriends an alien no one has ever met before.
"Just Another Saturday on Outpost Nine" by Bobby Nash: For Erin Moonshadow, alert claxons and patching up battle trauma is all in a day’s work.
"Fire Mining" by M.H. Bonham: Plasma storms from the dying suns aren’t the only dangers a good pilot like Saraah faces on Taurii 6.
"High Heeled Distraction" by Alan Lickiss: Undercover work isn’t always easy—particularly when it involves high heels and exotic dancing.
"Slow Burn" by Barbara Johnson-Haddad: People with high metabolisms need not apply to travel to Earth.
"Interstellar Bitches" by Selina Rosen: When an Earth lumber salesman cuts into her business, Drewcilia Qwah hires the Interstellar Bitches to deal with the problem.
"Steel Scorned" by Calie Voorhis: When the planet Steel turned its back on Onyx after her accident, she found strength in becoming an outcast.
"Royal Duties" by Rebecca Lickiss: Station Manager Pulu finds his day interrupted by a beautiful woman seeking sanctuary.
"Rebel Moon" by Carol Hightshoe: A intelligence agent returns to the home she thought closed to her forever.
"Hijacking the Legacy" by David Lee Summers: All Suki wants to do is go home, but finds that she has a home she never realized she had.
"The Silver Snake" by Laura K Deal: An undercover agent is sent to rescue a missing woman, but finds herself dealing with a multitude of sex-crazed insects and a love-struck teenager.
"Outpost 6" by Julia Phillips: Nyssa joined a group heading out to a colony planet after her relationship ended. Now, she’s a frontier doctor with a handsome doctor looking out for her.
"Ruler" by David B. Riley: A spoiled Imperial Princess is sent to a rebellious planet to be the new governor.
"Precious Cargo" by Lindsey Duncan: Kirin’s stepfather gives her a necklace that belonged to her mother, before dumping her on her aunt and leaving her. Both the necklace and the young girl carry deadly secrets.
"Mistral’s Revenge" by Laura Kjosen: As humans move out into the galaxy, their legends travel. Perhaps there is some truth to the ancient stories of elves and sirens after all.
Space Sirens: Full-Throttle Space Tales #2 will be available February 26, 2008, wherever great books are sold.
Space Sirens: Full-Throttle Space Tales #2.
Edited by Carol Hightshoe.
To be published by Flying Pen Press LLC, February 2009, under the imprint Flying Pen Press Science Fiction.
ISBN: 978-0-9818957-3-4. Trade paperback. Cover Price: $17.95 est.
5.5" x 8.5"x0.612"
Flying Pen Press catalog number FIC-L-01002.
Greetings from Opus Fantasy Festival!
We hope that you all had a great holiday and the start of a Happy New Year! This is our first official mailing for OpusFest in 2009 and we want to tell everyone about the exciting things happening at OpusFest this year.
First and foremost we want to tell you that OpusFest is back! This will be an exciting new year for the convention. Not only do we have a new date, we are at a new hotel as well. We have new blood bringing fresh life to the show and we can't wait to share it with you.
Announcing OpusFest 2009!
March 13 - 15, 2009
Red Lion Hotel (I-70 and Quebec)
Who will be at OpusFest:
Author Guest of Honor:
Author of Magic Bites and Magic Burns
Artist Guest of Honor:
World renowned visionary artist
Musical Guest of Honor:
Artist, Author, and Musician
Special Guest of Honor:
Editor of "Weird Tales" magazine
Virtual Guest of Honor:
Author of the DragonCrown War and Age of Discovery series
Author of Heart and Soul and Gentleman Takes a Chance
How much are tickets?
Adult Weekend Passes are $33.00 (Pre-reg) or $38.00 at the door.
Adult Day Passes are $15.00 (Pre-reg) or $20.00 at the door.
Children's Weekend Passes are $15.00 (Pre-reg) or $20.00 at the door.
Children's Day Passes are $6.00 (Pre-reg) or $10.00 at the door.
How much are hotel rooms?
We have a $79.00 room rate with the Red Lion Hotel.
How do I buy tickets today?
Go to: http://opusfest.eventbrite.com to buy your tickets today!
How do I reserve my room?
Go to: http://www.redlion.com/denvercentral
When you go to the Red Lion Webpage make sure to click on "Special Rates" and "Group/Convention code" and Enter: Opus09. If you have any problems using online booking please call the Red Lion at (303) 321-6666 - or - (800) 733-5466 to get our exclusive room rate.
What events are running at OpusFest?
- We are proud to announce that Avistrum Academy of Sorcery will be returning to OpusFest! If you are a fan of the Harry Potter series and ever wondered what it would be like to attend a class at a wizard school, you must come see what Avistrum has to offer. Beyond their classes and workshops, Avistrum will also be hosting a Dark Wizard Ball on Friday night to help welcome everyone back to OpusFest!
- Castlewall Productions will be back at OpusFest with their amazing swordfighting performances. Castlewall has performed at various festivals and renaissance faires. They are an amazing group and if you missed them at the last OpusFest, this is a great chance to see what many people are talking about.
- We will be holding a new Costume Contest at OpusFest. Free tickets and/or prizes will be awarded to the top costumes in various categories. This is your chance to show off your skill and talent, or just have fun. Don't want to get on stage? We will be giving out various prizes to people who are wandering the convention in costume as well.
- There is plenty more to know about. We will be adding additional details to our website and strongly encourage people to keep checking it for the latest updates. The web site is: http://www.opusfest.com
Are you interested in running a panel, workshop, performance, etc at OpusFest?
Send an e-mail to: email@example.com and we will try to fit you into the schedule. Our space and time slots are currently very limited.
Are you interested in having a vendor booth at OpusFest?
We only have a limited number of vendor spaces left. If you are interested in being a vendor at OpusFest send an e-mail to: firstname.lastname@example.org
Do you have other questions regarding OpusFest?
You can e-mail us at: email@example.com with general questions or requests for information. We will do our best to respond to you promptly.
From all of us at OpusFest we look forward to seeing you there in March!
The OpusFest Staff
P.S. Forward this message to your friends and let them know about OpusFest! We enjoy meeting new people at OpusFest, it is what keeps our show fresh and exciting every year.
- Current Location:Denver, CO
- Current Mood: giddy
1st Newsletter of 2009
Wow! A lot happened in 2008… so much so I haven’t gotten a newsletter out since Nov. I’m hoping to get things rockin’ & rollin’ again!
Each newsletter will be set up for easier navigation. That way, if you want to only know about signings, you can skip down to that, for example. That format is as follows:
III. Previous Releases
IV. Web Presence
VII. Online Appearances
VIII. Book Signings
I hope this new format works for everyone. Feedback is always welcome!
2008 closed with a chaotic but pleasant trip to Arizona to see the folks, who had not been able to get back to Colorado this year. For those not in the know, my mom and step-dad live pt in CO, and pt in AZ. However, age and health issues have made it harder for them to go back and forth, and eventually they will settle in AZ permanently. While it sucks to have them so far away, it’s ultimately better for their health.
My son is switching schools this week. His previous school with the Cherry Creek School District was a huge let down. Supposedly one of the best districts in the state, they have abused Dylan mentally over this last year, not taken his doctor’s recommendations seriously and downright lied to us. My son has Sensory Processing Disorder, which has led to other problems, but his testing is through the roof for reading and math. These types of children are considered “twice exceptional.” Vanguard Classical School specializes in the TE student and thus, the change. This prompted a huge change in my life, as well.
I’m moving to be closer to my son and his new school. This is just a matter of five miles from where I am now, but it is an important five miles. This will help with my commute to work, and school, as well. Speaking of school, Arapahoe Community College is kicking me out. They say I’ve been there too long and I have one semester to graduate or be expelled. So, I’m switching to Metropolitan State College of Denver (Metro) in the fall. It will be nice as I’ll be reunited with some friends and teachers that I’ve missed.
Full Throttle Space Tales Vol #2 - Space Sirens (978-0-9818957-3-4) is done. It should be out in February. This book was a nightmare to get to press. I’ll be glad when this one is finally on the shelves, even if it is, um, five months overdue. My story “Justice is Not Taken by The Storm” is in it, which is a prequel of sorts to this next one.
Wondrous Web Worlds Vol #8 – is a collection of the best short stories as voted by the readers of Sam’s Dot Publishing’s e-zines. My story, “The Devil You Haven’t Met” was the winner for their publication The Martian Wave back in 2007. It’s finally coming out this winter.
I have one more short sold, for Full Throttle Space Tales Vol #3 – Space Grunts. This was a tough one, my toughest critique to date. Dayton Ward, the editor, is well respected and has a huge following. I knew I had to bring an A-game story and apparently it was! “The Thing With Private Leon’s Face” is a tale of civil war, first contact and innocence lost. I’m looking forward to the reviews on it. This will be out in May.
Finally, I’ve had a chapter proposal accepted into The Complete Guide to Writing Paranormal Fiction Vol 1. My chapter on researching the paranormal is my next big project and will take up most of January and February.
I sold just over 200 copies of She Murdered Me with Science from August to December 2008. I think I would have done more if I’d had time to do marketing in the areas where I was signing. I also sent out a lot of copies to newspapers for review, but they never did the review. I’m focusing more on web reviews now. Please, if you’ve read my book, post a review on Amazon, Bn.com, tower.com or any blog site!
Space Pirates has sold well at conventions, but not as well at book signings. No #s yet.
Since my all encompassing website is some ways away, I have continued expanding my presence on the internet by including pages on Facebook and Livejournal. They all mostly say the same thing, but sometimes I play around and do something unique, like donating to a good cause on Facebook, or getting a little more personal on Livejournal.
Crystal’s “Interviewing Authors” blog is a well-read web page and she secures interviews with both big names and newbies, such as myself. David Lee Summers, editor of Space Pirates, helped us connect. Click below for the content:
My hometown newspaper, The Daily Herald, has a weekly section concerning events in and around my alma mater high school, D.C. Everest. I got a call for their top journalist and we spent an hour on the phone. The article came out Oct 31st (spooky, eh?) and here is a link:
Here’s a review of Space Pirates from The Central Arizona Speculative Fiction Society. It’s quite a ways down, so do a search for “Summers” when you bring up the PDF. No mention of my story, so I assume the critic counted mine as one of the seven or eight he didn’t like. LOL!
CoSign - Colorado Springs
Connooga – Chattanooga
Opus – Denver
Starfest – Englewood
2009 Author Open House – Englewood Public Library
MisCon - Missoula, MT
Fiestacon - Tempe, AZ
MileHiCon - Englewood
None currently scheduled
January 24th – 2pm to 4pm
Barnes and Noble – Citadel
Colorado Springs, CO
March 7th – 2p to 4pm
March 8th – 1pm to 3pm
Barnes and Noble
Barnes and Noble – Littleton
8136 West Bowles Ave
Littleton, CO 80123
Barnes and Noble II – Glendale
960 S Colorado Blvd
Glendale, CO 80246
Borders @ Park Meadows
8557 Park Meadows Center Dr.
Lone Tree, CO 80124
2401 North Ave
Grand Junction, CO 81501
6001-R Lomas Blvd N.E.
Albuquerque, NM 87110
542 N. Guadalupe
Santa Fe, NM 87501
Tattered Cover – Highlands Ranch
9315 Dorchester Street
Highlands Ranch, CO 80129
Who Else? Books @ The Denver Book Mall
32 N. Broadway
Denver, CO 80203
- Current Mood:productive